just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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