i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
