People in love make me want to vomit
stop calling my apartment porn island.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize