We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
