How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
