The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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