do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize