shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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