Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
