There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
We got so high we made milksteak
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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