I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
