I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
These tits shall not be calmed
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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