I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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