Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
i believe in u and ur pee
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
