I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
