I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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