did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
