it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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