I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
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