i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
