My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
