Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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