Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Randomize
