This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
