ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
