Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize