google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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