After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
