Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Randomize
