I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Of course I have a pirate flag
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
