K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
The struggles of a small town man whore
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
