Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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