i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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