If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
