I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
