A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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