I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Randomize
