WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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