I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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