I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
