Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
