20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize