i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Randomize