Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
