i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Randomize
