you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
