He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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