Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
