sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
