Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize