So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
farters have to be the big spoon...
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
